Things I Cannot Do With a Fractured Arm/Elbow

  • Bend my elbow (obvious)
  • Go out of parental sight for extended periods of time
  • Spin a flag (this will be a problem as today was the first day of band camp. I’m not out for the whole season, just the first half)
  • Walk across a room/field in band camp without people asking if I’m out for the season
  • Get in my bag, find phone, and flip phone open without missing calls
  • Get out of bed unassisted
  • Take a shower
  • Clasp a bra
  • Sit on the ground without pain
  • Get up to a standing position painlessly
  • Stay up till 1 AM
  • Get dressed easily
  • Climb stairs without holding on to railing
  • Carry heavy objects
  • ‘Go anywhere without people offering to help me, which is nice, but when I went to the doctor, this 60 year old lady insisted that she throw out my empty Coke can. I think my legs work fine…
  • Multitask
  • Read a book easily
  • Close the car door
  • Run
  • Dance
  • Have a day pass without going to doctors who talk about scary things like pins in my elbow
  • Lift anything in my left arm
  • Play Manhunt
  • Apply deodorant to left armpit easily
  • March in MB (until doctor clears me)
  • IM quickly
  • Wash my left hand with WATER, not Purell
  • Walk anywhere not in house
  • Go to sleep without shifting positions for two hours in hopes of finding a comfortable one
  • Sleep through the night without my industrial strength pain medications running out, causing me to yell for assistance (can’t get out of bed, remember?)
  • And…I CAN’T FUCKING TYPE AN LJ ENTRY WITHOUT 25 RED DOTTED LINES APPEARING UNDER ALL MY MISSPELLINGS DUE TO ONE HANDED TYPING!!!

~ by Luna on August 18, 2008.

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